Turkey-Salmon’s day isn’t going well so far. In a moment, he’ll mash the keyboard with his rotting drumsticks and painfully access the orgy of links that you see below. And then he’ll feel better. And so will we. Deep breaths. Let’s review progress this week.
Boss Higgsoning
- Some dude called Higgins proved he had bosom.
- The inside of a camel’s mouth will haunt your nightmares. Seriously, don’t click that.
- When Mozart wasn’t knocking out concertors, he was writing pure filth for his mates.
- Rippling muscles and flimsy chiffon blouses. Some romance novel covers are so terrible, they’re delightful.
A man’s seven-year-old nephew hates his beard. They make a film about it:
That’s no moon
- This incredibly detailed model Death Star was made by Tatumaru5963. By carving a ping pong ball. What have your hobbies produced lately?
- Filth break: Dino-pr0n [NSFW. Not safe for good mental health, either] and some cheekiness from the Wimbledon magazine.
- Twitter has provided an insight into a Beatle’s brain and let me tell you, it is mildly disturbing.
- KT Tunstall found the pinnacle of Britishness.
See that seahorse see his seahorse self
- Here’s an incredible image of a seahorse checking his reflection in a diver’s watch.
- Where’s the safest place to keep yer owl these days? Ridiculous. Adorable.
- It’s hard to maintain your hatred of beetles when they’re decked out like a locket from Elizabeth Duke.
- The apes have got hold of technology. I’ve seen how that movie ends and I don’t like this news one bit.
- Much less threatening: three bottle-feeding kittens.
He’ll put a spell on you. ‘Cos your HIS.
This guy’s lip-synch is mesmerizing:
You liked all this, didn’t you? You want more? We aim to please:
All of Helen’s Panning for Internet Gold wonder columns
And some of our favourite recent ones:
- Panning for Internet Gold: The ‘Trump Power’ edition
- Panning for Internet Gold: The owl-naming edition
- Panning for Internet Gold: The Mos Eisley Party Rock edition